Communication

I have seen Mormon missionaries on the street in Elbasan. They were in Vlora and I have been told they are in most cities in Albania. They will have a tough sell here. The coffee culture in Albania makes Seattle look like Idaho Falls. People here like to “pi kafe”.

You can hardly meet someone before they invite you to have coffee. The coffee bars constitute about every 3rd shop in Elbasan (I estimate it is only about 1 in 5 in Seattle). Of course, I fit right in to this as I was a morning regular with the “Geezers” in McCall (best regards to any of you who are reading this). Coffee here comes as espresso, macchiato, cappuccino and Turkish. Turkish coffee is like cowboy coffee back home, where you mix the grounds with the hot water and strain it out with your mustache. They like lots of sugar and fresh cream in their coffee, but I can get it without, which I prefer. I usually hand the sugar packets right back to the waiter so they don’t end up as waste.

One difference in Albania, however, is that the main point in having coffee is to chat. Albanian for having a chat is “bej muhabet” and I can testify that the emphasis is on the habit. Going for coffee with friends or colleagues less than 3 or 4 times a day is unusual. I have not seen anyone with a cup of coffee on a table or desk while they are working. So, we go out to talk and, of course, I am still at the “me want cookie” stage of my developmental language skills. This is frustrating for both me and my Albanian friends.

Did you know Albanian verbs have 3 conjugations in 19 classes with 16 tenses and 6 moods? This includes one just to express surprise, disbelief or emphasis. There is also one to express wishes that is used for the myriad of Albanian “blessings” that are used socially (like wishing a long life for the children of a family you have just met, or blessing the hands of the cook after a meal you have eaten). There are additional irregular verbs that don’t follow a pattern. Also, the non-active form of the verb “to eat” means “to quarrel”, which I think derives from “competitive feeding” of guests which is big in Albanian culture. However, what I really find confusing is the declension of nouns and adjectives with five cases, and forms, definite, indefinite, plural and singular. Then there are the pronouns which have clitics, little extra words thrown in just to make things interesting, it seems, sometimes used, sometimes not, sometimes used instead of the pronoun, etc. There are also short forms and phrases that are commonly used but make no sense in literal translation. I think all this is the reason Albanians are famous for the use of gestures in their communication and you are considered rude if you do not use at least some when you talk. Language competency testing starts in less than 2 weeks. Wish me luck, but remember to use the optative mood.

Tom Lehrer said, “If people have trouble communicating, the least they can do is to shut up!” This sentiment is not prevalent in Albania. Just because I can’t speak the language doesn’t stop people from having a conversation, on the furgon, on the bus, on the street, in the coffee shop and especially with the family at home. The extended family comes and goes, daily. They all engage me in conversation. This seems ingrained in the Albanian psyche. I have noticed that almost everyone over the age of 15 has a cell phone, but I have not seen one with an I-Pod or MP3 player plugged into their ears.

Asking personal questions of people you have just met is common. They want to know about your family, your home town, your job, your religion, your politics, how much money you make (if you are interested yourself, Peace Corps volunteers’ taxable income here is about $85 a month), your age, even how much you weigh.

One day, in the kitchen, I was talking with the mother of my host family. She was trying to tell me about her experiences in Greece as a refugee from the civil unrest in 1997. Apparently she walked with her family from Girokaster, near the border, for 3 days. Once across the border they were beaten by the Greek military. She thinks of that even as she is applying for a visa to let her work temporarily in Greece. She is concerned about the recent killing of the deputy head of an opposition party, with elections coming up in less than 6 weeks. I missed a lot of this conversation. She said she looks forward to our discussions when I have become fluent. So do I.

Another time, I was sitting in the room of the grandmother. This is where the TV is kept and which also serves as a living room. The popular comedy show, “Portokalli” was on. Portokalli means “orange”, but that is also the color of the warning light on a traffic signal, so it has shades of meaning. One of her sons, a laborer in southern Italy where he lives with his family, was visiting. He was gregarious, partly due to the raki (homemade Albanian brandy) that was consumed to celebrate his visit. We talked about many things, mostly in Albanian and partly in his Italian and my Spanish. One of the running gags on Portokalli is a skit on an English language class called “Follow Me”. I am starting to get some of the humor. I don’t need a looming exam to motivate me in my study.